My Blessingway

Last night I had a very small, intimate blessingway, consisting of me, my neighbor, my doula, and a friend from my old ward (who had the same doula) and her baby. I was so excited for the night. The boys were gone, I got some fruit and gourmet cupcakes, and I put on peaceful music. We started out eating (my doula brought more fruit and veggies) and sharing birth stories. We ended with two activities. The first was a bonding ceremony, in which we wrapped blue-and-green-colored string around our wrists and shared wishes for the birth. Then we cut the strings and tied them as reminders to think about and pray for me. The second activity was a fear releasing one. My doula wrote down any fears or negative thoughts we had and then burned it later at home. I also got some lovely gifts: a tabletop fountain, candles, lotion, and bath salts. I felt so happy and uplifted afterward. The experience was amazing and perfect, much better than I had originally planned. I felt really loved and supported and I'm no longer nervous but excited for this baby's birth!

Blessingway Gift Ideas

My sister-in-law and doula are throwing me a blessingway next month. (Read about blessingways here.) If you've been invited to one and don't know what to get the mother, here are some blessingway gift ideas:

• scented candles
• massage or essential oils
• jewelry (you can find cute birth-related jewelry on Etsy)
• bath & beauty products
• artwork (your own or others')
• personal letter
• encouraging quote
• poetry (your own or others')
• relaxing music
• service (cooking, cleaning, helping with other children, etc.)

(The photo is of a blessingway gift I made for my friend. When our car got broken into a few months ago, none of the valuables were taken, but this was! It was gift wrapped, so they didn't know what they were stealing. I wish I could have seen their face when they opened it! I made my friend another one yesterday, but forgot to take a photo.)

Baby Food Jar Favors

Once Caden started eating baby food, I found myself with a ton of jars I didn't want to throw away but had no use for. Then I came up with an idea: as my gift/favors for the blessingways I attended, I decorated baby food jars with paper and ribbon and put a tealight candle inside for the ladies to light when the mother went into labor. Super cheap and easy!

First version:

Second version:

Third version:

I ran out of ribbon, and the store didn't have any more, so I used what I had and it came out ok:

You could fill the baby jars with candy instead for baby shower favors. Baby food jars also make great storage containers for craft items, such as buttons and confetti. How have you used baby food jars?

Blessingway vs. Baby Shower

In the past four months I have hosted three blessingways (and have zero photos--sad, I know). I had never even heard of a blessingway until I offered to throw a baby shower for a friend, but someone else wanted to, so another friend offered that we would give her a blessingway instead.

What is a blessingway?
A blessingway is a special event to honor motherhood and birth. Its purpose is to encourage and support the mother as she mentally prepares for her baby's birth. Instead of giving gifts for the baby, attendees write letters or poetry for the mother or give her a pampering or handmade item, such as lotion. The women may address fears the mother has or share their own inspiring stories. Other activities may include drawing on the mother's belly, tying yarn on their wrists or ankles as a reminder of the mother, or doing a bead ceremony (each person chooses a bead for a necklace and says a positive word, like peace).

How is it different from a baby shower?
A blessingway focuses on the mother and her mental, emotional, and spiritual preparation for birth. It is more sacred in nature. A baby shower focuses on the baby and material preparation and is more lighthearted and fun-oriented.

Who should have a blessingway?
Blessingways are great for women who either find great joy in or fear childbirth, enjoy bonding activities, or have all the baby things they need.